Friday, February 18, 2011
Free to be you and me
Total random stuff off the top of my head. I was thinking out loud and wrote it down:
I'm totally dating myself with this. As a kid I was obsessed with this record and book. It's one of the happier childhood memories that I have. Last year at the book fair I bought a newer version for K who loves it as well. I'm not going to write about Marlo Thomas or her project. I'm not sure what I 'm going to write about but earlier this title popped into my head so I'm going with it.
It may or may not have to do with "all the drama" and the fact that the last real link to one of the performers has been severed. Finally. Thanks to Facebook we were virtually connected, while I had cut all ties defriending seemed like a childish thing to do. Thankfully, I am not above being childish. In a strange coincidence this person removed their profile from Facebook altogether. Another name added to my block list and now I'm done. With the exception of friend-of-a-friend status all ties to negativity are now broken. I made this friend of a friend promise to keep my name out of it since I am no longer involved in any aspect of this now former friend's life. Their friendship is no longer my business or my concern.
Although I learned a lot about people and their dirty little secrets, I also learned that when someone tells you that you can trust them, run. They're full of it. When you notice a red flag but justify it because you like the person, think again. Red flags are raised for a reason. D and I have gone back a few years and compared red flags, we were either blind, hypnotized or under the influence. Regardless of the cause we missed about a thousand of them. Thinking back, knowing what I know now I have figured out exactly what went on and it makes me sad. Sad to know that I was never really a friend but a pawn in a game that I didn't even know I was playing.
I guess the point here is to trust your instincts, it's OK if you get a bad feeling about someone you consider a friend. It's OK to get yourself out of a bad situation regardless of the circumstance. It's OK to put yourself first rather than hurt someone's feelings. They say all's fair in love and war but they never say anything about friendships. I'm here to tell you to free yourself. Don't accept bad behavior just because it comes from a friend. Don't second guess an uncomfortable feeling because you feel sorry for someone, don't forgive bad (or psychotic) behavior because you know where it's coming from. Chances are you don't.
Free yourself from the sins of other people's past and worry about yourself.
All the mistakes I make arise from forsaking my own station and trying to see the object from another person's point of view. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson