Too many mental tabs open today.

Monday, January 3, 2011

Resolutionary Wars Part 2

OK, so here's the part where I say all the things I plan to do this year. Please notice that going to the gym is NOT on this list. While I'd love nothing more than to have Katy Perry's body if it means going to the gym every day it's not going to happen. I'd rather starve myself than workout every day. Don't know why either. I just hate it. So in no particular order here are the things I'd love to do/get done in 2011:

1. “Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today.” Yeah, yeah. Easy for you to say Mr. President (Thomas Jefferson) I'm sure your household staff made it a bit easier for you to not put off your shit. I know I get bad about procrastination and that's why it's at the top. Please feel free to send me an email (or text or phone call) when I put off stuff. Thanks.

2. Hold your tongue. I like idle chatter as much as the next guy and I can easily get caught up in a coffee klatch. Lately this kind of shit has come back to bite me on the ass and I find that I'm defending myself against words that never came from my mouth. I'm going to keep my mouth shut and ears open, which is what I do anyway but this time more so. It's that or find a good libel attorney.

3. Patience is a virtue. Whatever. So is justice and I never get to see any of that. I know, no need to be bitter. This year, like all the others that have passed, I vow to have more of this elusive virtue. While I have no problem being patient with my seven year old, I find very little patience while dealing with morons on a daily basis which leads me to:

4. Acceptance. I will try to be accepting, even of said morons. I will do my best not to yell at idiots who talk incessantly on their cell phones while driving or checking out at the grocery store. Honestly though, I will try to remember that not everyone thinks like me (lucky for them). Not everyone has the conversation mapped out word for word before it even started. Not everyone was born with the cynical gene that I seem to have been doubly blessed with. I will do my best to take deep cleansing breaths before I offer my opinion.


5. Bin there, done that. OK, about these bins in my house. This is the year they leave. If I don't get them on Ebay then some lucky kid is about to be blessed with a wardrobe fitting that strange Cruise kid, without the high heels. I did draw the line at that. These bins contain a ridiculous amount of high end designer kid clothes, worth a fortune. Lucky for D (and my Visa card) they were either bought at sample sales or given to K as payment for modeling. I'm not kidding about the fortune either. Currently she has an outfit that retails for $300 in her closet. Thankfully she likes it and has worn it a few times. This was a trade thing and it cost us about 30 minutes of our time. In addition to that she got 2 other outfits which probably cost the same amount. They are hanging in her closet with tags attached as we speak. If only I could wear a size 6!!! Anyway, this is the year I lose the bins and gain valuable space in my house.

6. I'll OCD you later. I joke about this often but it's really not funny. I have started many posts about my OCD but deleted them all. Not because the words didn't align properly (a little OCD humor) but because it's really hard to discuss seriously. Recently Dr. Phil suggested I go on meds to manage this little problem of mine. This bothers me for so many reasons, one of them being my aversion to meds. While I allude to the effects of OCD in therapy I have yet to fully disclose exactly how debilitating it actually can be sometimes. The fact that he mentions meds without knowing how bad it really is makes me think this is something I should consider. It's not just about closing cabinets and making neat little piles of things. It's a deep rooted fear that fills every waking moment with thoughts of disaster. I'll go into detail about this soon. I guess this is a double resolution: I'll work on managing it AND talking about it seriously.

That's it for now. I mean right now. This list is long and I really need to cut it down a bit. If I spend all my time resolving I won't have any time for fun which is another thing I have on my list.

More fun.

Less stress.

No drama.

Let the games begin!


  1. One of the promises I made for myself in 2011 was to be more present with the ones I value. I want to spend time with you again this year. And I'm not putting THAT off either! Watch me.

  2. OMG the title of my next post is Anti-social networking, my biggest resolution yet. More face to face and less Facebook. That was my first status for 2011 and I mean it. Love you!!

  3. From your one of your old Besties....AMEN!!! What a great resolution. I started this one last year and still going. Best way to go!!!!!

  4. It's the only way to keep the wrinkles away, without Botox of course :P

    Peace and Love!!