Too many mental tabs open today.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

Let Down

The video above is from my all time favorite band, Radiohead playing their song "Let Down" from OK Computer. It's a song they rarely play live, it's hard to reproduce live so this video is a treat! According to Thom Yorke the song is about an enormous fear of being trapped. This post isn't about music or Radiohead, last night when I was out to dinner with my bestie A she told me to write about how I foiled her plans for a birthday party that she wanted to plan for me, I didn't exactly foil anything, I just never told her the truth about how old I was (it's all right here). She told me to write about how she was let down, and the picture can be a breastfeeding baby (let down, get it?). I'll give her the title but I don't really want a stranger's boobies on my blog.

So A, this is for you:

So recently I started a huge Spring cleaning project, one of the things that desperately needed cleaning was my conscience. When I met A somehow she got the impression that I was a few years younger than I really was. How did she get that impression? I told her, and then I forgot about it. She would make a comment here and there but I never really thought about it. Then as it got closer to my birthday she kept bring it up, she did the math and thought that the birthday that was fast approaching was a "big" one. Crap. I knew that ignoring it wasn't an option. I had to come clean, I just wasn't sure how. The more I talked to her the more she would grill me about what my plans were, the more that happened the more I retreated. She started talking to me about calling D to get a list together for a party she was now planning, a party at her uncle's beach house. Crap! When we went out for lunch recently she followed me around a jewelry store to see what I liked. She was so into this.

When I finally told her she wasn't the least bit upset that I wasn't truthful (actually she didn't believe me and thought I was now lying to get out of a party) she thought that part was funny. She was upset that she wouldn't be throwing me a party, she was serious too, I believe this implicitly. Last night we talked about this, she didn't get to throw the party but she insisted on taking me to dinner. I'm not really big on birthdays, I like going to dinner with D and K, that's about it. I went out with A because I owed her that. It was actually a really fun night, we went to a newish place in Santa Monica and were both happy to see that it was packed when we walked through the door. We were happier to see that our waiter was somewhat of a comedian. We tormented him throughout the evening and he gave us a fair amount of crap as well. At one point A decided to tell the waiter my birthday story and then proceeded to tell him that I was now 50. I was happy to see that he didn't believe it, I don't think he believed my real age either but that's OK.

Usually on our "dates" I have a glass of wine and worry about getting home early. Last night we split a bottle of wine over three hours laughing and swapping secrets along the way. She also made me open a present at the table (something that would usually never happen) she had selected things for me that she knew I would love but never buy for myself (thanks again A, I wore it all today!!) We even had dessert, which was brought out with a candle and "Happy Birthday" written in chocolate. Thankfully there was no singing.

We stayed until the place was almost empty torturing our poor waiter until the very end, of course he loved every minute of it coming by our table often.

I hope A is over her let down, I hope she feels like she properly celebrated my birthday with me. I know that she feels like she missed the "big one" but I didn't do anything special for that one. D and I had a nice dinner at Nobu and that was fine with me. I don't really like big parties that celebrate me. I got over that for my wedding but that was difficult. I do like the intimate dinner thing, I can do that every year, maybe next year I can add a few people. Maybe even do something at my house. Maybe.

For now, this one is over and I have a long time to worry about next year.

Not that I'll be worrying.


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